Fellow co-workers, the office is a mad house. Nothing but stress, anxiety…work really can be a terrible strain on our mental health. Often we’re encouraged to either act out or seek seclusion any way we can. We’re uncomfortable, fidgety, and for this reason Ergonomics have found their way into every day life at the office.
Exhibit 1: The space-age, less than useful, ergonomic keyboard amidst a mountain of clutter.
I’ve got no beef with new-age ergonomic wonder science. But I do have a beef with this son of a bitch. And a bit of a beef with the hired Ergonomic Specialist that brought in a slew of devices, chairs, and remedies for our “subject” here. And please, do note the sharpened pencil. It can only be there for two reasons:
- To show us there really is nothing between the severed keyboard. Like passing a hula hoop over a levitating woman to show that there are no strings.
- The keyboard is entirely useless and the subject secretly uses the pencil exclusively.
Either way, after a long day of typos and a rate of 12 words per minute, its probably a good idea to do a little something extra for yourself. You know, to keep your brain calm, collected, and serene.
Nothing wrong with buying yourself flowers. Girls do this all the time to boost their self esteem and beautify their desks. Hell, even I’ve had a daisy or two sitting on my desk for a day or so. Again, no beef. Let it be, right? Wrong! Because these flowers aren’t from any shop—they were ripped from the supple earth of the business park grounds. More specifically? The planters in the lobby.
But I digress! We all seek beauty and sometimes that beauty is too much for us to handle. So what do we do?
We cry our eyes out, stuff the snotty tissues into an open drawer and make a nice, cathartic tea from our own tears. Face it, we’re all working too hard, right? WE ARE WORKING TOO HARD…and need a break.
So the next time you’re clacking away at your blog on Houdini’s dual-dialing, space keyboard, just steal some lobby flowers, have a good cry and ask yourself: Are you working too hard?